Bad Boys: What ya gunna do?

I have held my tongue for too long about the NFL “Bad Boys,” but that stops now. Over the recent months since the NFL season has ended we have seen many altercations involving NFL superstars. These people are morons, to quote Tom Hanks in “A League of Their Own,” use your head its the lump three feet above your ass.

The first on the list and maybe the one that has the most spotlight right now is Michael Vick, or as some of you may know him as Ron Mexico. If you have been living under a rock for the past few months and do not know what is going on, first lift the rock, second Vick has been accused of having dog fighting on his property and killing dogs as well as transporting dogs across state lines to participate in other fights around the country. As of now the total years in jail if convicted of all counts is 6 years. However, recently after one of Vick’s “boys” pleaded guilty there seems to be another count bigger than the other two that will be released in August. Vick’s “boy,” in my opinion the smart one in this moronic tribe decided to take a plea bargain and plead guilty on these two counts as to not be involved of the other count. I am pretty confident that the deal the government made with this guy was for him to take the plea and help catch the bigger fish in this situation Vick. Mr. Vick is going to be found guilty and if not our society has gone to hell, I am a dog lover as much of America is, how do you drown, electrocute, and smash dogs into the floor until death. What goes through someone’s mind when they are doing this? I have never been a Vick fan, basically I thought he was overrated but now its much bigger than that. This man should be thrown in jail and in his cell have 20 hungry pitbulls waiting for him. See how much he enjoys a real dog fight. I applaud Roger Goddell who is doing a fantastic job and who put his foot down telling Vick not to report to camp. My Bad Boy rating and Idiot Rating are out of 5 and Ron Mexico get a 5 and if found not guilty probably a 4 cause we all know he still did it.

Second on my “Bad Boys” list is Pac Man Jones. Is this guy out of his mind? Now I enjoy strip clubs as much as the next guy, in fact if anyone is ever in Niagara Falls on the Canadian side there is a place called Sundowners do yourself a favor and check it out, but Pac Man you are a moron. You have millions of dollars, if you really want to go to the clubs that bad I have an idea, send one of your “boys” to the club have him pick you out 10 girls and bring them back to the hotel and bring the club to you. This way you do not have to bite anyone, or pull a gun on anyone. The best part of all of this is that the night before you are going to meet with Mr. Goddell you are found in a strip club, and what a surprise causing a scene. You are an idiot, you are about to be suspended for multiple games and yet you decide hey lets start some havoc, they wont find out. Do you realize how lucky you are and that anyone reading this would kill to be an NFL superstar? Yet you are a menace to society and ruin your dream. I don’t know about you but if I accomplish my dream there will not be any chance I go out of my way to fuck it up. Bad Boys Scale-3, you’re not really bad you’re a moron. Idiot Scale-5, also change your name your ruining the name of a classic video game that this man loves.

Next Tank Johnson: I actually do not feel as much negativity towards him as I do with Pac Man and Vick. You are just a putz, do you think it is necessary for one person to have that many guns. Where do you think you live, and if you live in that bad of a neighborhood move! You have the money. I hate these people who think they are in a gang and need to be “strapped.” You are an NFL player stop fucking around, you get paid millions of dollars to destroy quarterbacks not shoot up the 7-11. On the bad boy scale you’re a 2, because anyone who needs that many guns is compensating for something. On the idiot scale your also a 5, if you have that many guys register it you fucking asshole.

Lastly lets move to Chris Henry, well I guess we can include the entire Bengals team. Ok this is a joke already, about 4 or 5 years ago the Bengals could not win a game and Leno bashed them one night. That weekend they won their first game and someone on the team called Leno out. Well now Leno has a lot more material, this team cant stay out of jail. It reminds me of the scene in “The Replacements” when the whole team gets arrested and sing in the jail cell. Maybe this is what the Bengals like to do on the weekends. I feel bad for the good guys of this team Chad Johnson is raising money for charity all the time, Carson is a class act and so is Marvin Lewis. The management needs to get rid of all the cancers and let this team get to a superbowl. I feel bad for the fans, the ones who have been here from the beginning when they couldn’t win a game. At least during that time they could respect the players on the team, now it’s a joke. The whole Bengals team gets a Bad Boy rating of 4 and an idiot rating of 4 as well.

In Closing, I give a salute to Roger Goddell, I was a big fan of Tagliabue but you have filled his shoes incredibly. I like the way he is punishing players and not letting them get away with this nonsense. We need these players to remember that they are the luckiest people in the world. They get to do what most of us wish we could do and they get paid millions, I would do it for free. If you want to take advantage of your money and power then you do not deserve the respect that the rest of the NFL gets. Why cant we have more players that are class acts, what happened to the Emmitt Smiths, Steve Youngs, Johnny Unitas, Dan Marinos. We need more of those guys now, the youth of America need real sports heroes. Posters of class act athletes on their wall not Vick and the rest of the thugs and bad boys of today. Anyone who owns a Vick jersey burn it or put it away, that goes for any other merchandise. Everyone stay classy and lets hear what you have to say.